pastorjohnb

Thoughts and musings on faith and our mighty God!

Tag Archives: marriage


by Leave a comment

Step in Faith

Reading: Jeremiah 32: 1-3a and 6-15

Verse 6: “The word of the Lord came to me: Hanamel… is going to come to you and say, ‘Buy my field at Anatheth'”.

As our passage opens, we learn three important facts. First, the word of the Lord again came to Jeremiah. Second, the Babylonians that Jeremiah had prophesied about are now beseiging Jerusalem. Third, King Hezekiah has imprisoned Jeremiah for said prophecy. Life does not seem very good for Jeremiah. It is with this knowledge that we read verse six: “The word of the Lord came to me: Hanamel… is going to come to you and say, ‘Buy my field at Anatheth'”. In so many ways this does not seem like a good idea. Jeremiah has warned the people – telling them that the Babylonians will win and will haul many off into exile. He knows that the exile will be long. So, buy some land?

God is always at work, often in ways that we either don’t realize or don’t understand. Because of more limited resources and a desire to more efficiently serve a smaller client base, our church lost our client relationship with this agency. The decision was then made to end a fellowship meal that was made possible because of the food we had been receiving from this agency. Almost immediately God began to work in my heart to do something new. The idea of starting a marriage makers group for young couples rose up in my heart. Driving to a conference last weekend, God planted another seed. I had arranged to have coffee or lunch with some youth who were at the college hosting the event. But one that I reached out to shared that they were taking a year off and were actually home. Thinking about her led me to think of other college-aged kids from church who were also in town. God posed this question: what about a Bible study for our young adults? My initial thought to both of these whispers was: now? Maybe not the greatest timing God? Yet in my heart I know God is right. ‘Trust me’ is the echo I keep hearing.

What land purchase as war wages around you is God leading you to? Where is God asking you to take on more when often you feel overwhelmed? God promises to provide the way. When we have the faith and courage to walk where God is leading, God will walk with us. We may not know the whole plan or even the next step, but God does. When the word of the Lord comes, may we step out in faith, finding God’s presence and strength as we go.

Prayer: Guiding God, thank you for giving me a heart for ministry. Reveal to me the next steps to minister to our young couples and to our young adults. Bring me the words of invitation and show me the plan to follow. If it’s just one step at a time, help me to step forward with you. Amen.


by Leave a comment

Imitate Christ

Reading: Hebrews 13: 1-8

Verse 8: “Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever”.

Today we are first encouraged to love one another. This extends both to our brothers and sisters in Christ and to the strangers among us. We are reminded that we might be entertaining angels when we extend hospitality to a stranger, to those we visit in prison, and to those who are mistreated. True hospitality draws no lines and sees no barriers. It loves both friends and strangers alike.

We are next encouraged to be good people. We do so by honoring our marriages, by keeping sexually moral, and by being content with what we have. Our contentment comes from our relationship with the Lord, which we read about in the quotes from Deuteronomy 31 and Psalm 118. The first emphasizes the fact that God will never leave us or forsake us and the second reminds us that with God as our helper we do not need to be afraid.

Our passage concludes with a reminder of what Hebrews 11 and 12 have been all about: following the examples of those pillars of the faith that have gone before. Here we connect back to Abraham and Isaac and Enoch… with Peter, James, John, Paul, and the other early church leaders. Verse eight concludes with the greatest one to follow, the perfecter of our faith, Jesus Christ. In this verse we read that “Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever”. Jesus loved all, was without sin, honored the pillars of faith, and gave the gifts of help in this world and an invitation to join him in eternity. The Holy Spirit is our ever present companion that never leaves us and always helps and guides us. Through faith in Christ alone we receive the promise of life eternal. It is the prize for which we run this race.

In verse seven we are encouraged to “imitate their faith”. When we strain forward, running the race like those pillars and especially like Jesus, we will help others to know the good news, to experience healing, to see miracles worked in their lives. In sharing Jesus’ light and love with others, we invite them into a relationship with Jesus Christ too. What greater gift can we offer to our friends and to the strangers in our midst?

Prayer: Dear Lord, you are the perfect example of loving God and loving neighbor. Give me the courage and trust to love you and all I meet today. May your love pour out into their lives today. Amen.


by 2 Comments

Fill My Heart

Reading: Mark 10: 2-12

Verse 5: “It was because your hearts were hard…”.

The Pharisees come to test Jesus with a question. Instead of just answering, He asks them what they think – “What did Moses command you”? He asks to begin a conversation. An answer would close the topic and perhaps the conversation. Jesus does not talk much about the legality of divorce but instead about the underlying issue that leads to the question. Jesus does affirm God’s commands from Genesis and adds, “Therefore what God has joined together let man not separate”. For Jesus, marriage should be a lifelong covenant relationship.

To the Pharisees answer Jesus initially says, “It was because your hearts were hard…”. In essence, Jesus was acknowledging that at times things happen because our hearts are hard. In this particular case Jesus is speaking to divorce but this thought applies to much more. If we were to use “because your heart was hard…” as a sentence starter, we could add many, many things.

So, what is the opposite of a hard heart? The obvious choice would be a soft heart. Instead of having a hard heart filled with anger, pride, jealousy… what would life be like if we had a heart filled with love and generosity and compassion? Instead of having a heart filled with the things of this world, what would it look like to have a heart filled with the things of God? It would look good. May it be so for you and for me.

Loving God, fill me with your love for the other. Giving God, fill me with your generous spirit. Compassionate God, give me eyes to see the needs and a heart to meet them. Fill my heart with you, O God. Amen.


by Leave a comment

Holy Marriage

Reading: Psalm 45: 1-2 & 6-9

Verse 7: “You love righteousness and hate wickedness, therefore God, your God, has set you above your companions by anointing you with the oil of joy”.

Wedding, baptism, or funeral? Based on the conversations that I have had with fellow clergy, a wedding would be their last choice. A baptism could involve a crying, unhappy baby when those waters run down their faces. A funeral could have some tension if the families do not get along, but that usually does not spill over into the celebration of life service itself. But a wedding… Oh the wedding horror stories. You have perhaps heard some. Maybe you’ve been a part of one yourself.

Myself, I like officiating weddings. Perhaps that will change. I’ve been blessed by all of the weddings that I have done. Meetings with the couples have been both fun and fruitful. There has not been a crazy mother of the bride or groom. No bride-zillas. The worst thing that has happened at a wedding was the three-year-old ring bearer who refused to walk down the aisle. (He did not have the rings though). Perhaps I am due for a doozy.

In today’s Psalm, a wedding is the focus. It sounds like a wonderful wedding – almost ideal. In this wedding, God is present and central to the event. The wedding covenant that Christians hold to understands that God is part of the covenant being made. The essence of a Christian marriage is captured well in verse 7: “You love righteousness and hate wickedness, therefore God, your God, has set you above your companions by anointing you with the oil of joy”. The couple promises to love no matter what, practicing righteous love in their marriage. The vow is one if exclusivity – setting aside all other companions, the spouse becomes the center of the others love and care. God anoints the new union with the oil of joy. What joy is experienced in the love consummated in Christian marriage!

Father God, today is a day when many will celebrate a wedding. God, please pour out your anointing oil of joy on all who join in holy marriage today. Bless them this day and forever more. Amen.


by Leave a comment

Grabbed

Reading: Philippians 3: 4b-9

Verse Seven: Whatever was to my profit I now consider loss for the sake of Jesus Christ.

Saul had a really good life.  His religious life checked off all the boxes: circumcised as an infant, a member of the tribe of Benjamin, a Pharisee, great zeal for his religion, a faultless follower of the Law.  To Saul, he was as faithful to God as anyone.  From his perspective on top of the pedestal, he looked pretty good.

But then Saul met the risen Jesus on the road to Damascus.  He went through a powerful transformation experience.  The new Christian, Paul, writes, “Whatever was to my profit I now consider loss for the sake of Jesus Christ”.  All the titles, all the accolades, the view from the pedestal – they all are lost.  In the next verse Paul calls all these things “rubbish”.  For Paul, they are pale and worthless compared to the “surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord”.  What a change has been wrought in Paul!

At times, some look at faith as Saul did – a series of rules to follow or boxes to check.  Baptized as a baby, came back to church for a dose of confirmation, returned maybe for graduation or to get married.  For others it is a bit deeper – come most Sunday mornings for the hour, say a short grace before meals, help out at the yearly ham dinner.  On the surface, their religion feels okay, maybe even good.  It would appear the requisite boxes were being checked off.

When Saul met Jesus, his life radically changed.  It wasn’t about saying that memorized prayer three times a day and eating only the “right” foods any more.  It wasn’t about coming that one hour on Sunday morning.   To Paul, the boxes were rote, they were false.  He gave up all “that I may gain Christ and be found in Him”.  Paul found a righteousness that comes not from the Law or anything he could do, but a righteousness that comes “from God and is by faith”.  Jesus reached out and grabbed Paul.  Life was never the same.

Has Jesus grabbed you?  Is self and all else loss for the sake of Christ?


by Leave a comment

Seven Years

Reading: Genesis 29: 15-28

Verse 20: Jacob served seven years to get Rachel, but they seemed like only a few days to him because of his love for her.

Jacob came to work for Laban after fleeing from home.  Jacob was his sister’s son, so Laban took him in.  After a month, Laban was coming to appreciate Jacob’s work, so he asks Jacob what he would like in exchange for his efforts.  Jacob has fallen in love with the beautiful Rachel so he names her as his desire and offers to work for seven years for her hand in marriage.  As I think about his offer, it seems like a long time.  Rarely does a dating relationship last longer than a few years unless marriage is the plan.  In such cases, people date for a while, consider and talk of marriage, and then set the date.  For most with marriage on the mind, they will cut it off and move on pretty quickly if the other is not “the one”.

Extending the idea of working for seven years, what would one be willing to work for for seven years?  If I had my mind on a new car, for example, would I be willing to work for seven years, saving a little each month, until I had enough money to buy that car?  In a job, would I be willing to work for seven years to make that next step up the chain of command or to earn that first raise?  Yet in the context of today’s story, these things are small targets or goals.  When our thoughts move outside the concrete, there are many things we work much longer than seven years for.  When we do so, these are the things that really matter in life.

I look at my marriage and see something that I am still willing to work hard for.  I look at my college-age and post-college children and see many years of raising them and am still very dedicated to working at raising them.  And then I turn to my faith.  At 51, this is a journey longer than any other in my life, yet I still continue to seek to draw closer to God.  Looking back, I can see how my relationship has grown and deepened.  Seven years seems like a small blip on the timeline.  In this sense, I can relate to Jacob.  Seven years “seemed like only a few days to him because of his love for her”.  May our love for God ever be the same.


by Leave a comment

Love: Sacrificial and All-In

Throughout our lifetimes many relationships will end.  Some childhood and high school and even college friends drift apart and life takes each a different way.  Sometimes people have to move to a new state or city.  Sometimes life comes to an end for one of the people in the relationship.  Sometimes our approach to marriage is similar.  They drift apart, one moves in a new direction, or one passes.  For some couples, divorce is the solution.  It is just a little easier to part ways than it is to keep it together.  For some people their marriage with the church comes to an end.  Both of these endings may be because of drift or because one changed or because of  hurt that occurred.

Both of these marriage relationships should reflect the love of Christ for us.  Recently scientists discovered that over time in a long-term, committed relationship something called ‘pair bonding’ occurs.  As it was once written: the two shall become one.  The love of Christ must be at the center of our human marriages as well as at the heart of our relationship with God and His church.

Every relationship has the potential to end.  In our human marriage the goal when it begins is ‘to death do us part’.  We pledge love and loyalty through thick and thin.  And couples really do mean it on day one.  When one chooses to join and be attached to a church, the words are much the same as is the intent.

The reality is both marriages take work.  A lot of work – both personal and as a ‘couple’.  Although there are circumstances that cause a split, these should be far fewer than they are.  Our love in these marriages needs to reflect the pure love that Jesus Christ demonstrated.  Our effort in these relationships should reflect His effort and commitment at the cross.  May our love also be sacrificial and all-in.

Scripture reference: Mark 10: 2-12