pastorjohnb

Thoughts and musings on faith and our mighty God!

Tag Archives: anguish


by Leave a comment

Make Some Noise

Reading: Habakkuk 1:1-4

Habakkuk 1:2 – “Lord, how long will I call for help and you not listen?”

We begin the week with two days in Habakkuk. Today we begin in chapter 1, where the prophet brings his complaint before God. In verse 2 we read, “Lord, how long will I call for help and you not listen?” The wicked Babylonians are growing in power and are moving in Judah’s direction. The prophet sees the injustice and idolatry prevalent in Judah. The prophet questions the collision course that seems to have been set in motion by God. In light of all this, the prophet asks the “How long…?” question.

Living in the last years of Judah’s existence before defeat and exile, Habakkuk sees a lot of injustice in the land. The wealthy and powerful have turned from God and the Law. They are causing harm to God’s faithful, to those trying to live righteously. This creates the violence, strife, and anguish that the prophet names. To Habakkuk, this warping of justice us not right. God must act.

Habakkuk offers us a model, a way to address injustice in our time. In our world today there is surely injustice. As just one example, some children are living in war zones and others are living in places of great poverty. Both lack the basics needed for daily life as God intends it to be: food, shelter, water, health care, education. Often those in power dismiss the injustices done to these suffering innocents as collateral damage or as the price to pay for some “greater good.” Habakkuk saw the injustice in his land and he cried out to God, getting God’s attention, asking God to do something about the injustices. May we too make some noise today, joining a long line of saints who have stood for what is right and just. May it be so.

Prayer: Lord God, we do not have to look far or for too long to see injustice in our world. Lord, yes, move our hearts and lips to action, calling on you to act, calling out those who cause injustice. And, God, move our hands and feet to action when we can be a part of the answer to our prayers and cries against injustice. Amen.


by Leave a comment

Anyone? Someone?

Reading: Romans 9:1-5

Verse 2: “I have great sorrow and unceasing anguish in my heart.”

Photo credit: Nathan Dumlao

This week’s Epistle reading comes on the heels of one of the greatest passages about the power we find when we choose to live our life in Jesus Christ. Paul has passionately built the case for faith in Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior. Romans 8 is one of the most convincing and moving arguments for choosing Jesus as Lord that can be found in the New Testament.

After completing this passage, I bet Paul felt drained. He poured his heart and soul into those words. Concluding that section, I can picture him letting out a big sigh, accompanied with a “Phew!” It was truly a monumental effort. And then his heart and mind turned to the great number of Jews who refused to see Jesus Christ as the Messiah, who refused to believe anything about having a saving faith in Christ.

In verse 2 he writes, “I have great sorrow and unceasing anguish in my heart.” Paul is heartbroken over the peoples’ refusal to even consider Jesus Christ as the Messiah. His compassion for his own people is so great that Paul would gladly be “cursed and cut off from Christ” if the people of Israel would just come to believe in Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior, as the Son of God. That is a deep compassion.

Is there anyone in your life that you long to see come to Christ? Is the someone for whom your soul aches and your heart longs for because of their refusal to accept Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior? For most of us, the answer to both questions is “yes!” Through our prayers and through our witness may we bring these before Christ.

Prayer: Lord, help me to be more intentional about how I am Christ to those who don’t quite know you as Lord and Savior. Use me in whatever ways necessary to draw these to you. Amen.


by 1 Comment

An Ear Turned Towards Us

Reading: Psalm 116:1-4

Verse 1: “I love the Lord, for he heard my voice; he heard my cry for mercy.”

In Psalm 116 there is a remembrance of a time of anguish, trouble, and sorrow. Death was near to the author. We all experience times of anguish, trouble, and sorrow. Many of us have had death come near. We can relate to what the psalmist felt. Even people who do not believe in God feel these emotions. Anguish, trouble, and sorrow are common to all of humankind.

In verse 1 the psalmist expresses his or her love for the Lord. Why? Because the Lord “heard my voice; he heard my cry for mercy.” In the moment of need, the Lord heard. As the psalmist cries out for mercy, the Lord hears the anguished cry. Being heard in the moment of need leads to the declaration that we find in verse 2: “Because he turned his ear to me, I will call on him as long as I live.” Because the Lord was there in the great time of need, the psalmist declares faithfulness for all of his or her life.

When you have been in a moment of great need, did the Lord hear your voice? Did others hear your cries? If the answer is ‘yes’ to either question, you know how much that matters. For family or friends who respond to our cries, we are forever grateful. If not aloud, at least we think in our minds that we will value that connection forever. How much more so for the Lord! The Lord ever has an ear turned towards us. Our God hears the smallest whispers and the loudest cries. The Lord is always near. So like the psalmist, may we too declare our love for the Lord, ever turning to the one who awaits our voice.

Prayer: Lord God, thank you for being ever present. You know us inside out – our thoughts, our feelings, our needs, our wants and desires. Yet you are eager to hear our voice. Thank you Lord. Amen.


by Leave a comment

Perseverance in Prayer

Reading: 1st Samuel 1: 4-20

Verse 10: “In bitterness of soul Hannah wept much and prayed to the Lord.”

Today we begin the story of Samuel. The story, of course, begins with his mother Hannah. As the story begins we learn that Hannah cannot have any children because “the Lord had closed her womb.” Children were a sign of God’s blessing. The other wife, Peninnah, had many sons and daughters. Because of Hannah’s barrenness, the husband Elkanah would give her a double portion. This attempt to show her love did nothing to alleviate Hannah’s grief and suffering. It did intensify the rivalry between Hannah and Peninnah. In verses six and seven we read that Peninnah provoked and irritated Hannah year after year.

Have you ever prayed for something year after year after year? Have you ever endured long suffering? If so, you understand Hannah’s hardship. Year after year she prayed. Year after year. At times she must have wondered if God was listening. At times she must have wondered why her suffering and barrenness must go on and on. We’ve all prayed and prayed for relief, for healing, for a change… and have had these questions, these doubts.

One year Elkanah and the family travel to Shiloh to worship at the temple. Alone in her thoughts we read, “In bitterness of soul Hannah wept much and prayed to the Lord.” Hannah prays from deep within her heart, from deep within her place of pain. The priest Eli questions her sobriety. Explaining that she was praying “out of my great grief and anguish”, Eli offers her a blessing from the Lord.

Hannah does indeed find favor with God as she becomes pregnant and has a son. Hannah’s steadfast faith and perseverance in prayer bears fruit. The thing she most desired was given as a blessing from God. May we, like Hannah, persevere in our prayers, trusting in the God who hears us and who loves us. May it be so.

Prayer: Lord God, in the waiting, keep me focused on you. As time lengthens out remind me to trust into your plans. I know your timing is not always my timing. Guide me to walk faithfully day by day, knowing you are good. Amen.


by Leave a comment

Walking in Lament

Reading: Psalm 31: 9-16

Verses 14-16: “You are my God… My times are in your hands… Save me in your unfailing love”.

Psalm 31 is one of many Psalms of Lament. These Psalms balance lament and grief and sorrow with God’s love and mercy and presence. To walk with God through trial and suffering and affliction is such a blessing. The journey is much harder for those without faith. Verses ten through twelve sum up well what it feels like to be alone in our sorrow and anguish, alone as people utter contempt and conspire against us. At times we have all felt like David does in these verses. At times we all feel like “broken pottery”.

Psalm 31 shifts in verse fourteen. Here David’s faith begins to take over his emotions. In trust David says, “You are my God”. He is claiming his place within God’s unfailing love. In humility David continues, saying, “My times are in your hands”. Here David is acknowledging that God alone is in control. This humility undergirds his prayers for help and deliverance. David knows that all things work according to God’s purposes. It is freeing to turn it over to God. Inviting God to shine upon him, David asks God to “save me in your unfailing love”. There is an assurance that God’s presence brings salvation. With God, David will walk confidently into all that lies ahead. Even though there is great lament in the Psalm, David’s words also reveal the trust, humility, and assurance that are ours when we walk with God.

Reflecting on this Psalm my mind is drawn a week ahead, to the Garden of Gethsemane. In a time of deep sorrow and lament Jesus will wrestle with what lies ahead as he considers his journey to the cross. He is challenged by the thought of drinking the cup of wrath yet he too trusts in God, submits his will to God’s will, and moved forward, confident of God’s presence with him.

As we face times or seasons of lament, as our faith calls us to walk a difficult road, may we too live within God’s love and care, humbly trusting in the Lord our God. May it be so.

Prayer: Loving and guiding God, when tides rise, when clouds roll in, may I cling to you. Draw me into your presence, surround me with your love, assure me of the plans that you have for me. You are my God. In you I trust. Amen.


by Leave a comment

Changed?

Reading: Matthew 22: 13-14

Verse 13: “Throw him outside, into the darkness”.

The parable that we began yesterday ends with a hard truth of our faith. Yesterday we read about the invitation to the banquet going out to all – “both the good and bad”. While many folks will hear about Jesus and many of these will hear or sense a call to follow him, many will reject Jesus just as the religious leaders and most Jews did. Jesus speaks to this in verse fourteen, where he says, “For many are invited, but few are chosen”.

The man thrown out of the banquet represents those who hear the invitation but refuse to accept Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior. They refuse to change, to put on a new self. Instead, they remain a person of the world. The king tells the attendants to bind him and “throw him outside, into the darkness”. The darkness represents hell, where there will be much “weeping and gnashing of teeth”. This hard truth reminds us that as we leave this world, there are only two options. Those that fail to confess Jesus as Lord and Savior will experience eternity in a place of torment and anguish. The few that are faithful will be chosen for an eternity in the light and love and joy of the King of kings.

The man made the choice to come unprepared. He put in no effort to be a part of the event, to know the host. He responded to the invite to get out of it what he could. Still today the appearance of faith can be a tool used to gain favor or standing or some other advantage in the world. In the end only a changed heart, a heart fully committed to Jesus Christ, will lead us in into the final wedding banquet. May it be so for you and for me. Amen!

Prayer: Loving God, when I try and get by with a shallow or pious or fake faith, convict me quickly. Continue to walk with me each moment, for the day and your is unknown. In all I say and do and think, may I honor you. Amen.


by Leave a comment

To What Extent? How Far?

Reading: Romans 9: 1-5

Verse 2: “I have great sorrow and unceasing anguish in my heart”.

Have you ever been in a situation where you wished you could take someone’s place? Or have you ever been in a situation where you’d give anything to change the final outcome? Maybe someone you love lost a child and you’d take that child’s place in a heartbeat if you could. Perhaps things could have been done or said differently and that person wouldn’t be estranged from the family. I’d guess that almost all of us have been in these situations or have heard stories of others who were in these or similar situations.

Paul is right there with us. In verse two we read, “I have great sorrow and unceasing anguish in my heart”. You can feel his pain. Paul grew up in a Jewish home and became a Pharisee, a scholar of the Jewish faith. Paul knows what all of “my own race” know – the covenants and prophecies, the law and temple worship. They have the faith that has been longing for the Messiah. They know the stories and scriptures that point to Jesus as the Messiah. But they will not recognize him as the Savior, as the one, as the Messiah. To one who does accept Jesus as Lord, it is hard for Paul to understand how the Jews do not. Paul believes in Jesus Christ so strongly that he is willing the be cursed to hell, to trade away his salvation for the sake of the Jews believing in Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior. Paul is willing to take the place of that child. Paul is willing to do anything to change their unbelief.

Paul’s willingness should be our willingness. Like the men with the treasure in the field or the pearl of great worth from last week’s Matthew 13 passage, we should be willing to give up anything or to do anything to see another come to Christ as Lord and Savior. As we ourselves ponder those we know and perhaps love who are living outside of a relationship with Jesus, to what extent are we willing to go so that they may be saved? How far?

Prayer: Lord, we know that at times the cost of faith might be high. The question I wrestle with is how far am I willing to go to bring another to Jesus Christ. Work within me to expand the range of what my answer truly is. Ever push the boundary, Lord. Thank you Jesus. Amen.


by Leave a comment

Call on God

Reading: Psalm 17: 1-7 and 15

Verse 6: “I call on you, O God, for you will answer me; give ear to me and hear my prayer”.

Today’s Psalm is a prayer to God for help and protection. As I read David’s words, I know that I have prayer similar prayers at times. Just as it is from time to time with my prayers, in David’s prayer there are two angles. The first is mentioned above – a desire for help and protection. We all pray these prayers, usually daily at least. If these prayers are not for ourselves, we certainly raise them for family, friends, and others. These prayers can be sincere petitions for God’s touch or presence or they can be prayers of anguish and desperation.

As we read today’s Psalm, for me there is also a familiarity with the righteousness of David’s prayer. He is assured of his own righteousness and holy living. David claims to have “kept from the ways of the violent” and that his “feet have not slipped”. There is almost an air of ‘Look how good I am God. How can this be happening to me’? Again, I too have prayed this kind of prayer from this place in my heart. When we have been striving to live faithfully and something unjust or unethical happens to us, it is natural to question God as to why it is happening. Even though it may be our natural inclination, it is dangerous ground to try and leverage God or to expect better because of what we perceive as our own superior righteousness or goodness.

In verse six David shows his trust in God. Here we read, “I call on you, O God, for you will answer me; give ear to me and hear my prayer”. David is sure that God will hear and answer. The Psalm also closes with David trusting in God. He believes that in the morning, when all of this has passed, that he will see God’s face. The trust that God will see him through is a trust that we too should model. As we ourselves bring our prayers and petitions to God, may we humbly exhibit the same deep trust in God’s presence and care and love for us. Day by day may we too see God’s face.

Prayer: Lord God, remind me daily of your love and care. In ways small and large grant that I may see your hand at work in my life and in the church. May I ever trust in you alone. Amen.


by 1 Comment

Present to Us

Readings: Psalm 31: 9-16 and Philippians 2: 9-11

Verse Sixteen: “Let your face shine on your servant and save me in your unfailing love”.

The readings today begin in the Psalm. Verses nine through thirteen speak of sufferings and trials. There is weakness and anguish and contempt and brokenness and slander and conspiring. For David, the author, it seems as if he has hit a pretty rough stretch. At times we can relate to what David is expressing. Life is not always easy and we sure can find ourselves tossed about.

In verse fourteen the Psalm takes a turn as David writes, “I trust in you, O Lord”. There is an assurance that God is near. The psalmist then writes, “my times are in your hands”, illustrating a deep trust in God. The section of the Psalm that we read today concludes with, “Let your face shine on your servant and save me in your unfailing love”. In the these words is a quiet confidence that God will always be present.

As we shift forward several hundred years, we find Paul writing about Jesus in Philippians. In the verses proceeding verse nine Paul has acknowledged Jesus’ humility and obedience as well as His servant’s attitude. In these characteristics we also see the trust and confidence in God’s presence that came out in Psalm 31.

For both David and Jesus, although great men, they suffered at times in this life. It was through these experiences that they came to truly look to God. By doing so, they came to have this deep and abiding trust that God would be present and that God would carry them through, that He would save them. As we journey through life we too can trust that God will always be present and that He will always carry us through. As we do this more and more we will come to that place of living with God ever-present to us. May we trust and lean into God this day and every day. Amen.