pastorjohnb

Thoughts and musings on faith and our mighty God!

Tag Archives: guilt


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New Again

Reading: Psalm 51:7-10

Psalm 51:8 – “Let me hear joy and celebration again; let the bones you crushed rejoice once more.”

Continuing today in Psalm 51, David recognizes his separated state. Yes, God has seen his sin and sent the prophet Nathan to break through to David, leading him to see his sin. David knows that God alone can make him “clean.” In verse 7 David asks for this cleansing – for God to purify and wash him so that he is “whiter than snow.” On his own David would remain in his sin and would struggle with the guilt and shame that often accompanies our sin. The same is true for us. We need God’s mercy, grace, and forgiveness to once again be back in right relationship with God.

In verse 8 David is not yet there – not yet redeemed and restored. He longs for these things. We can hear this longing as we read, “Let me hear joy and celebration again; let the bones you crushed rejoice once more.” When we are in this place we too can feel this way. For David, the sacrificial system and the giving of an animal’s life would provide the “means” or payment for forgiveness. For us today, however, Jesus interceded on our behalf. He paid the price, offering himself as that needed sacrifice. In communion we remember this gift formally. But we don’t need to take the bread and cup to be redeemed and restored. Forgiveness comes through a simple prayer of confession and repentance. Jesus then creates a “clean heart” in us, once again walking with a “faithful spirit” within us. Thanks be to God.

Prayer: Lord God, we experience times when we are separated from you because of our sin and its impacts. Sometimes we tarry, wrestling with the guilt or shame. In these times, O Lord, call out to us, pull us into your grace and mercy. Drawn close to you, make us new again, O God. Amen.


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Instead…

Reading: Job 20:19-29

Job 20:22 – “Even in their plenty, they are hard-pressed; all sorts of trouble comes on them.”

Today’s reading comes from the book of Job. Much of the content, including today’s, is set in the belief of the day: “God blessed the righteous and punishes the wicked.” In the understanding of the day, there were no exceptions. Zophar, today’s speaker, and Job’s wife and other friends – they cannot begin to fathom the possibility that Job is righteous. Job lost almost everything, therefore Job is a sinner.

In verse 19 Zophar is speaking of “they.” These are the wicked in the land. These are the sinners in the context of the day. These crush and abandon the poor, stealing their houses. These do not know contentment. The constant desire for more leaves their “belly” ever hungry. And what they’ve accumulated, Zophar says, “their riches will not endure.” He adds, “Even in their plenty, they are hard-pressed; all sorts of trouble comes on them.” Yes, there is no true peace or joy, no true contentment for the wicked of this world.

One day, though, Zophar tells us, God will fill the wicked’s bellies with “burning anger.” One day the wicked will enter the “complete darkness” that awaits them. Yes, one day heaven will “expose their guilt” because this is the fate of the wicked. All of this remains true for those who live for self, who trod over others and do not care, who take advantage of the powerless and the marginalized. There is a choice to be made. There is a better way: the way of Christ. Instead of accumulating, we can practice generosity. Instead of running over, we can stand with. Instead of seeking advantage, we can strive to level the playing field for the lowly and the downtrodden. Brothers and sisters in Christ, may it be so for you and for me.

Prayer: Lord God, turn our hearts away from selfish thoughts, desires, and actions. Turn our hearts towards compassion, generosity, and justice. Use us to stem the tide of evil that plagues our land. Use us as light and love that shines into the darkness and hate. Amen.


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New Life in Christ

Reading: Romans 7:4-6

Romans 7:6 – “We have died with respect to the thing that controlled us, so that we can be slaves in the new life under the Spirit.”

As we begin this week focusing on having lips to speak and ears to listen, we begin in Romans 7. In our walk of faith, one of our greatest struggles is often choosing what voice(s) to listen to. For Christians this struggle often centers around what the world or our culture tries to tell us. This voice tells us that “things” matter most: wealth, power, status… Our inner being, “self,” can be drawn into this narrative because we are innately selfish, greedy, prideful…

In today’s passage Paul writes about choosing new life in Christ instead of trying to live under the Law of Moses. For devout Jews at this time following the Law was almost all that mattered: offer this sacrifice, say that prayer, attend the festival, give, worship. On the surface these can sound and can be good. But when one’s faithfulness to the rules leads to judging and rigidity in things like compassion, empathy, and service, then it can become a bad thing. And failing to uphold the Law led to a guilt and a shame that the Law could not remove.

Paul shares how this changes with the coming of Jesus Christ: “We have died with respect to the thing that controlled us, so that we can be slaves in the new life under the Spirit.” The religion of checking the boxes, the life that leads to death, has been superceded by faith in Christ. Living the new life in Christ, through the power and presence of the Holy Spirit, tunes our ears to the will and way of God. This leads to a life that bears good fruit. Rooted in love, this fruit is peace, patience, joy, hope, forgiveness, self-control… Thanks be to God for the new life that we find in Christ!

Prayer: Lord God, as we die to self and to the ways of the world, what freedom we find. Instead of chasing after and worrying about accumulation, we become filled with content and peace, we practice presence and generosity. Instead of seeking to elevate self, we praise and glorify God as we lift others up. Thank you for the life of joy and hope, of love and grace found in Christ. Amen.


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Still Our God

Reading: Joshua 6:1-16

Joshua 6:2 – “Look. I have given Jericho and its king into your power, along with its mighty warriors.”

God says, God does. God promises, God follows through. God is steadfast and true, unchanging and trustworthy. God loves and protects, leads and guides, forgives and reconciled. This is who and what God is. Always has been, always will be.

In chapter 6 God declares to Joshua: “Look. I have given Jericho and its king into your power, along with its mighty warriors.” If we pause right here human nature would question this. They are inside a double wall, inside what looks impregnable. “Have given?” Yes, for God this is already a done deal. The instructions for victory follow: silently march around the city once a day for six days. Have priests blowing trumpets and priests carrying the ark at the center of the procession. On day seven, march around seven times, blast the trumpets, then lift a shout. Those huge walls will collapse and Jericho will be yours! How much would your human nature question these battle plans? Mine would and does.

How often have you been stressed or grieved or overwhelmed and needed the peace that God promises? At first there is doubt and maybe questioning. But you bow your head in prayer, calling on the promise, and that peace that passes understanding fills your heart. How often have you been unsure of the next step or even of the direction to take? Again, you bow in prayer, calling on the guidance that God promises, and the choice becomes clear or a door opens (or closes.) How often have you been trapped in sin or wracked with guilt and needed the forgiveness and reconciliation that Jesus promises? Once again, you bow your head, trusting in what you don’t deserve, and you feel it washed away, making you new again. These are but a few of the Jericho’s that we face. The God who brought the walls down for Israel because they were faithful? This God is still our God.

Prayer: Lord God, we are grateful that you are who and what you’ve always been. You are for us and you have good plans for us. You love us. In our moments of fear or doubt or whatever need, help us to lean into your promises and into your character, surrendering our Jericho to you once again. In that moment, be our God. Thank you. Amen.


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Fear, Shame, Guilt…

Readings: Matthew 26:69-75 and 27:3-10, 15-26

Matthew 27:24 – “So he took water and washed his hands in front of the crowd.”

Photo credit: Falaq Lazuardi

Today’s readings contain denial, betrayal, and giving in to social pressure. These actions are driven by fear, shame, guilt, regret, greed, power. These are actions and emotions that we too wrestle with as we try to walk faithfully with our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.

Peter had followed the mob who had arrested Jesus – at a distance. He feared being caught up in what was happening. In the high priest’s courtyard, Peter is accused three times of being with Jesus. Each time Peter’s denial of Jesus grows stronger as the fear rises. His fear turns to shame as the rooster crows. When was the last time that you denied Jesus, either in word or deed? What “crowed” to lead you to tears?

Judas agreed to betray Jesus for thirty pieces of silver. Seeing that Jesus is condemned to die, Judas feels “deep regret” for betraying “an innocent man.” The religious leaders refuse to change course. Guilt and regret lead Judas to take his own life. When have you felt deep regret because you betrayed Jesus? How did you resolve your inner turmoil?

Pilate has the power of life and death in his hands. He tries to free Jesus. His wife tells him to “leave that righteous man alone.” Tension builds and Pilate gives in to the mounting social pressure. To try to relieve his guilt and regret, he “took water and washed his hands in front of the crowd.” Pilate allows the power to slip through his fingers like the water slips through. We’ve all given in to the crowd, turning away from Jesus. What do you do to relieve your guilt and regret?

Prayer: Lord God, it is hard to admit, but at times we’ve played the roles of Peter, Judas, and Pilate. When we’ve failed you, we’ve felt what they feel. It is our human nature rising up to protect self, position, status… In our next moments of testing, Lord, raise up the voice of your Holy Spirit. May it be louder and stronger than our fear, shame, guilt… And when we fail, remind us of your unconditional love and endless grace. Amen.


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Such… Good… News

Reading: Isaiah 61:1-4

Verse 1: “The Lord has sent me to bring good news to the poor… to bind up… to proclaim release for captives… liberation for prisoners.”

As Isaiah’s ministry and Israel’s time in exile is coming to a close, the prophet offers these words of hope and promise. These words were written to a people living in captivity in a foreign land. These words can be applied to many times and to many people who are experiencing exile in many forms. These words spoke to the people of Jesus’ day as they lived under the Roman occupation. These words speak to many people today. These words speak to you and to me.

Verse 1 is so powerful. It is jam-packed with hope, promise, rescue… It begins with a call to “preach good news to the poor.” Maybe this is material good news – food, help with rent or gas or utilities, warm clothes for the winter. Maybe this is spiritual aide that helps them to know that they are beloved and worthy, that they matter and belong to God and to us. Then there is “binding up” those who are broken and hurting. Verses 2 and 3 also touch on this. The binding up is healing for the ill and the suffering. It is also comforting those who grieve. It is drawing in the lonely. There is also proclaiming the freedom from captivity and darkness that the Lord brings. This encompasses the Israelites literal release from Babylon. It also includes release from addictions and other abusive relationships or from unjust situations and systems. And it includes freedom and release from our sins and from the guilt and shame that is often connected to our sin.

In one form or another we have each experienced each of these forms of the good news. As followers of Jesus Christ we too are sent to bring this good news to others. Taking where we have been, recognizing how we got to where we are at, may we help others to experience the good news of Jesus Christ our Lord.

Prayer: Lord God, walking and living with you, we’ve experienced firsthand all of what Isaiah speaks of. We’ve been healed, freed, rescued… Use each of us today and every day to bring the good news of Jesus Christ to those who need healing or hope, release or rescue, restoration or redemption. Amen.


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The Gift of the Spirit

Reading: Romans 8:1-11

Verse 9: “You, however, are not in the realm of the flesh but are in the realm of the Spirit, if indeed the Spirit of God lives in you.”

Photo credit: Diego Gennaro

Looking at Romans 8 yesterday we focused on the choice between life and death. Today we focus on what the choice for Christ (or for life) means to us as followers of Jesus Christ.

First, we find freedom from the condemnation of the Law. All of the sin offerings in the world could not remove the guilt and shame of disobedience. In and of ourselves we could not meet all of the requirements of the Law. It was a never ending battle in which we’d always fall short. In response God sent Jesus, “God’s own son.” Jesus became the sin offering for all of our sin, bringing us his own righteousness in place of our guilt and shame.

Second, through this gift our Spirit becomes alive. In verse 9 Paul writes, “You, however, are not in the realm of the flesh but are in the realm of the Spirit, if indeed the Spirit of God lives in you.” The Spirit, with our cooperation and effort, begins to lead and guide us, taking root in our heart. The Spirit brings us “life and peace.” These are found and lived out through our relationships with God and with each other. These ongoing and growing relationships help us in our battles with sin here and now. This yields life in our “mortal bodies” as we too one day experience God’s resurrection power. Thanks be to God for the gifts of life and peace.

Prayer: Lord God, thank you for the Holy Spirit. Thank you for coming incarnate to show us the way to life and peace. Thank you for rising up again to show us the way to life eternal. Between now and then, live in our hearts, drawing us closer and closer to you. Amen.


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A Community Effort

Reading: John 11:38-45

Verse 44: “Take off the grave clothes and let him go.”

Photo credit: Wylly Suhendra

In the second half of our John 11 passage, Jesus moves into action. He says to no one in particular and therefore to everyone, “Take away the stone.” Practical Martha protests. Jesus draws her back to the spiritual: “Did I not tell you that if you believed, you would see the glory of God?” And after a prayer to God, Jesus calls Lazarus out of the grave. The man dead four days walks out, still wrapped in his grave cloths.

This is one way that Jesus calls us back to life. But for almost everyone, he calls us back from spiritual or emotional death. We have fallen short and have sinned. We have separated ourselves from God and from one another. We come to a place of repentance and we are restored to a right relationship with God. But we still have our grave cloths wrapped around us. These take different forms: guilt, shame, remorse, regret. Often there are also real consequences that we must face. It is a very hard road to walk alone.

Jesus says, again, to no one in particular and therefore to everyone, Take off the grave clothes and let him go.” This last step of restoration is up to the community. It is something Lazarus cannot do on his own. It is something we cannot do on our own. To fully walk in the new life that Jesus offers, we need community. To restore our relationships, we need forgiveness and reconciliation. To begin to live again, we need welcome and engagement. Faith is a community effort. We are not always on the receiving end either. At times we will need to be the ones offering forgiveness… to others. May we be as willing to give as we are to receive.

Lord God, the community is such a beautiful thing. Walking together in faith is your plan and purpose for us all. Help me to be humble when I need forgiveness and restoration. Guide me to be generous when others need to receive. Bless your beloved community. Amen.


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Available to All

Reading: Romans 5:12-19

Verse 16: “The judgment followed one sin and brought condemnation, but the gift followed many trespasses and brought justification.”

Romans 5 connects our Genesis 2 and 3 readings with the life and death of Jesus Christ. In verses 12-14 Paul reminds us that sin entered the world through Adam (and Eve). With sin came death. In the last part of verse 14 Paul identifies Adam as “the pattern of the one to come.” Yet, as Paul writes, “The gift is not like the trespass.”

Continuing on Paul explains that the trespass leads many to death. In verse 16 he writes, “The judgment followed one sin and brought condemnation, but the gift followed many trespasses and brought justification.” Once sin entered the world, humanity faced condemnation. Sin and death and guilt began to reign in our lives. Until the gift came. The gift was God’s son, who came to earth to die on a cross for our sins. Jesus’ innocent life was the atoning sacrifice for all sin. His life paid the price for our sin. This gift brought justification – the process of being made right with God. Our sin and guilt is washed away by the blood of the lamb. Through the power of the grace of God, we are made new again.

There is a totality in the actions of both Adam and Jesus Christ. Sin came into all humanity through the sin of Adam and Eve in the garden. What flowed through their veins flows through all of our veins. Whether or not one is a believer, we are all prone to sin. That is all people’s human condition. At our base level we all look out for #1. There is also totality in Christ. Grace “overflows to the many.” It is available to all people. The offer of justification “brings life to all humanity.” There is no limit on God’s grace. It is available to all people. Just as sin touches all of our lives, so too can grace. This is how Jesus is the new Adam. This is the beauty of God’s love. It is not just for all who believe. It is equally strong and available to all who are lost in their sin. Thanks be to God.

Prayer: Lord God, I am so grateful that your grace washes over me again and again and again. It is undeserved yet always available. Thank you, thank you, thank you. Yet this is there for all people. I am so amazed at the limitless nature of your love and grace. It is for all people everywhere. This is truly amazing and wonderful. Thank you, Lord. Amen.


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Washed Clean

Reading: Psalm 32

Verse 5: “I acknowledged my sin to you and did not cover up my iniquity… you forgave the guilt of my sin.”

In our Psalm today we find a pattern that we all know intimately and we find the truth that breaks or redeems this pattern. Like David, the author of the Psalm, we are familiar with sin. Some may think that as our faith matures, we sin less. We do, I believe, get a handle on many things that caused us to sin when we were less mature in the faith. However, as our faith matures, we come to understand more as sin. Things that we did not see before as sinful, suddenly it is sinful. For me, for example, gossip was one of those things. At a point I realized that this was sinful and that I needed to control my tongue. And physical age, which tends to parallel our “faith age,” brings with it challenges that often require greater faith – health issues, emotional changes…

No matter our age or the maturity of our faith, David names something that we all struggle with. Strangely it is not the sin itself. If one is truly repentant and seeks God’s help, then God will provide all that we need to overcome that sin. It is the guilt that we can struggle with. I may be able, with lots of help from God, to get a judgmental attitude turned around. The guilt for damage done remains though. This too I need to surrender to God. In verses 5 we find the promise: “I acknowledged my sin to you and did not cover up my iniquity… you forgave the guilt of my sin.” When we are honest with God and seek God’s power, then God not only forgives but also takes away our guilt. Now we may have work to do to restore or reconcile that relationship, but the stain or the guilt is washed clean by God’s love.

Fully forgiven, we get to the place that David is at at the end of the Psalm. The guilt and the weight of the sin removed, we know that God’s unfailing love surrounds us. We can rejoice in the Lord. We can experience joy and gladness as we lift our praises to God. What a wonderful Savior. Thanks be to God!

Prayer: Lord God, you seek to walk with us daily. Beside us, you give us strength and courage. Beside us, you welcome our honest conversations and confessions. Through the life given by your son, you cleanse us and free us from the sun and guilt that we bear. Thank you for your mercy, for your grace, and for your great love. All my days may I praise your holy name. Amen.