pastorjohnb

Thoughts and musings on faith and our mighty God!

Tag Archives: suffering


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Real Stories

Reading: Mark 14

Mark 14:31 – “But Peter insisted, ‘If I must die alongside you, I won’t deny you.’ And they all said the same thing.”

Just before the Passover, Jesus is in Bethany. A woman anoints Jesus with some very expensive perfume, preparing his body for burial. Although the disciples think this is a waste, Jesus defends her and tells them that her actions will be remembered and told as part of the good news. Judas leaves and agrees to betray Jesus.

Gathering the 12, Jesus celebrates the Passover. Again his instructions about how and where come true. Jesus announces his betrayal and they all ask, “It’s not me, is it?” While eating the meal Jesus says of the bread, “Take, this is my body.” Taking the cup, he says, “This is my blood of the covenant, which is poured out for many.” After singing praises, they head out to the Mount of Olives.

There, Jesus tells them they will all fall away. Peter boldly declares his loyalty to Jesus. But Jesus says to Peter, before the roosters crowd twice you’ll deny me three times. Peter insists, “If I must die alongside you, I won’t deny you.” The other eleven say the same thing. Yet when asked to pray with and for Jesus, they all fall asleep. Jesus struggles with the coming suffering, yet remains committed to God’s plan and purposes.

Judas then comes with a mob and betrays Jesus with a kiss. Jesus is arrested and all the disciples run away. We too profess a faith willing to die for Jesus yet in those moments when discipleship has a cost, how often we too run away. A sham trial seals Jesus’ fate. It is Jesus’ words of truth that actually condemn him.

We close today with Peter living our Jesus’ words. Three times Peter denies being with Jesus. The rooster crows. Peter recalls Jesus’ words and breaks down in tears. We too are familiar with failing Jesus and with the feelings of remorse. They too are signs of our humanity. And they are a step on the path of mercy and grace. Thanks be to God for both.

Prayer: Lord God, how real today’s stories are. Sometimes we are the woman – a part of a story of faith. Sometimes we are Peter – sure of our rock solid faith yet so vulnerable to fear. And sometimes we’re Judas – betraying you with our words and actions. No matter what, though, you love us just the same. For your great and unconditional love, we say thank you. Amen.


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Bold Words

Reading: Matthew 26

Matthew 26:35 – “Peter said, ‘Even if I must die alongside you, I won’t deny you.’ All the disciples said the same thing.”

In Matthew 26 we move into Jesus final days. He announces that in two days he will be handed over and crucified. Matthew notes that the chief priests and elders don’t want it to happen during the feast – they fear the people’s reaction. But it will happen as Jesus said and as God has planned.

That night at the house of Simon (formerly the leper), a woman anoints Jesus’ head with very expensive perfume, preparing him for burial. The disciples see it as a waste, but Jesus commends her actions. Judas then goes and agrees to betray Jesus. The next day Jesus and the disciples celebrate the Passover meal. Jesus tells them that one of them will betray him and Judas is eventually identified. Jesus then offers the first communion. Judas is still there. They sing some songs and then go to the Mount of Olives.

Jesus tells them that they’ll all fall away that night. Peter says he’ll never stumble. Jesus tells him that he’ll deny Jesus three times that night – “before the rooster crows.” Boldly Peter says, “Even if I must die alongside you, I won’t deny you.” The others echo this sentiment. Jesus moves to the area known as Gethsemane to pray, inviting the disciples to “keep alert” as they join him in prayer. They sleep. Jesus wrestles with the suffering to come but ultimately prays to God that this will be “what you want.” Awakening the disciples, Judas and the crowd arrive.

Identified with a kiss, Jesus is arrested. All is to fulfill the scriptures. All the disciples run away. Jesus is taken not to the temple but to the home of Caiaphas, the high priest. Peter follows at a distance. It is at a distance that he will boldly deny Jesus three times. The fake trial ends with the religious leaders hitting and spitting on a condemned Jesus. Funny how their literal actions mirror what the disciples did to Jesus, figuratively speaking. Sadly, at times, we do the same.

Prayer: Lord God, the sad but glorious ending begins to unfold. Human weakness, pride, jealousy, betrayal – all are present. Obedience, trust, faith, courage – all present as well. Lord, help us to be like you instead of like the religious leaders and like the disciples in their moments of fear. Lord, empower our faith and trust, our obedience and courage. May our words and our actions be bold. Amen.


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So It Will Be with Us

Reading: Matthew 24-25

Matthew 24:46 – “Happy are those servants whom the master finds fulfilling their responsibilities when he comes.”

Chapter 24 is almost all about the signs of Jesus’ return. The end of chapter 24 and most of chapter 25 is about being ready or prepared for that day. Chapter 25 closes with the consequences of our decisions and actions leading up to that day. The conversation begins outside the temple, where Jesus predicts its destruction. This leads the disciples to ask about the end times when Jesus will return in glory.

Jesus says there will be many things that will happen. There will be false prophets and false christs. There will be war, famine, earthquakes, great suffering, and persecution. Many will fall away. Then the sun and moon will go dark and the planets will shake. Christ will come on the clouds in great splendor and power. The angels will gather the chosen ones. Jesus then reminds us that no one knows the day or hour. It will come upon the earth just as the flood came upon the people of Noah’s day. The message is clear: stay alert, always be prepared for the day.

From 24:45 through 25:30 we find three parables that describe what it looks like to be alert and prepared. In the first parable we read, “Happy are those servants whom the master finds fulfilling their responsibilities when he comes.” The bad or unfaithful servants will be cut to pieces and thrown into hell when the master returns unexpectedly. In the second parable the wise bridesmaids had plenty of oil (faith.) They will enter the wedding (heaven) when the late groom (Christ) arrives. The door will be closed. The foolish or unprepared will hear, “I don’t know you” when they try to get in. In the third parable the faithful who have put their gifts to work will hear, “Come, celebrate with me.” The lazy and evil will be thrown into the “furthest darkness.”

We close with the parable of the sheep and the goats. This summarizes the results of how one lived. The sheep lived for others, feeding the hungry, visiting the prisoners, welcoming the strangers. They did so in the name of Christ. Eternal life is their final reward. The goats ignored the hungry… Their final reward is eternal punishment. So it will be with us.

Prayer: Lord God, how we live day by day matters. Keep us faithful in the small things, attending to all that you place before us, using the gifts and blessings you have given us to bring your kingdom to fruition. Amen.


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You Will Know

Reading: Joel 1-3

Joel 2:27 – “You will know that I am in the midst of Israel, and that I am the LORD your God — no other exists.”

Photo credit: Marek Piwnicki

In three chapters Joel packs a ton into his prophetic message. He follows the normal pattern: devastation, cry out, repent, deliverance. Joel is a bit unique in the fact that Israel’s sin isn’t included. That usually leads to the ‘devastation’ part of the cycle. Joel begins with an invading army. Locusts? Assyria? Babylon? We’re not 100% sure if it’s real or metaphor as Joel is really hard to date. He does not include kings or names that can be tied to a specific point in Israel’s history. The effects of whichever army are all the same: starvation, death, suffering, grief. Even the earth and creatures of the earth mourn, so great is the fire that burns before and after the army’s invasion. People shake in fear as the army rushes upon the city and into their homes.

Yet… there’s that word! Yet, even now, says Joel, God invites us to return to God with all of our hearts, to weep and fast and mourn. Yes, weep, fast, and mourn over what we’ve done. Yes, weep, fast, and mourn over the consequences of that sin. Do so because God is compassionate, merciful, very patient, full of love, and ready to forgive. So, cry out to God! Who knows? God does. God brings renewal and restoration to a repentant Israel: corn, wine, oil… green pastures and fruitful trees. An early rain will be a “sign of righteousness” that will pour out abundance on them. And then the Lord declares, “You will know that I am in the midst of Israel, and that I am the LORD your God — no other exists.” Is this because of these physical blessings or is it because of what God promised next?

In verses 28-29 God proclaims that the Spirit will be poured out on all people – sons and daughters, young and old, slaves. All people will receive the gift of the Spirit. All barriers will be broken down. Then Joel turns to the coming day of the Lord. This day will bring darkness but all who call on the name of the Lord will be saved. The darkness comes as God gathers and judges the nations. Through Joel, God condemns a variety of offenses against God’s people. Crowd after crowd will come before the Lord. But God will be a refuge for the faithful. Jerusalem will be holy and a spring will come forth from God’s house. The new Judah and Jerusalem will be forgiven. It will be inhabited forever. Thanks be to God.

Prayer: Lord God, what good and great plans you have for those who love you. Yes, the storms of life will come, drawing us closer to you. Yes, times of separation will come as we choose self over you. Even then, you work to renew our relationship, to restore our connection. You remain ever ready to forgive. You continue to declare that you are our God. Thank you, Lord, for your unconditional love. Amen.


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Lamenting Suffering

Reading: Lamentations 3-5

Lamentations 3:22 – “Certainly the faithful love of the LORD hasn’t ended; certainly God’s compassion isn’t through!”

Photo credit: Falaq Lazuardi

Today’s key verse summarizes the feel of Lamentations 3-5. There is hope in these words of lament. There is a hope that God isn’t utterly done with Israel. Yes, the author knows the promises of rescue and restoration, but in the depths of the suffering, hope can flicker.

Lamentations 3 is in the first person. It reads as if Jeremiah were reflecting on the hardships and trials of his life as a prophet. He has felt God’s hand against him. He has felt like God “silences my prayer.” These memories of suffering bring bitterness. He muses, “Certainly the faithful love of the LORD hasn’t ended; certainly God’s compassion isn’t through!” Hope arises, though, as he declares, “Great is your faithfulness… The Lord is my portion! Therefore I’ll wait for God.” As the chapter continues, there is an invitation to “examine our ways” and to recognize, “We rebelled.” This is step one to forgiveness.

Chapter 4 reflects on the people’s suffering. The children are thirsty and hungry. The author laments that their fate wasn’t like Sodom’s – quick and final. He laments, death by the sword would be better than death by famine. The false prophets draw some of the blame. There is reality in verse 12: “Our end had definitely come.”

The last chapter is a communal lament. They invite God to notice their disgrace. They recognize that they are burdened by past sins. Their joy is gone. They are “doomed because we have sinned.” Hope surfaces again as the community recalls how God reigns from one generation to the next. With that hope, they offer this request: “Return us, Lord, to yourself. Please let us return!” May it ever be so.

Prayer: Lord God, we too lament when we suffer justly for our sins and for our choices to be of the world. We too long to end these seasons and to return to you, our God and king. In the suffering and trial, refine us as you are working to rescue us. Draw us to you, O Lord, again and again. Amen.


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Warning and Promise, Reality and Hope

Reading: Lamentations 1-2

Lamentations 2:19b – “Pour out your heart before my Lord like water. Lift your hands up to him for the life of your children.”

Photo credit: Shane Rounce

Today and tomorrow we read through Lamentations. These five acrostic poems lament the fall of Jerusalem and the suffering that followed. Jeremiah (and/or others writing in his voice) give a vivid and emotional account of this dark time in Israel’s history. Jews have read this book yearly during the month of Ab as a reminder of the consequences of sin and disobedience to God’s Instruction.

Chapter 1 opens with “Oh no!” This phrase evokes the wailing customary in a Hebrew funeral dirge. Jerusalem is personified as a woman, sitting alone, widowed and enslaved. There is no one to comfort her. She recalls the treasures that filled the palace and temple. She also laments the walls and gates being destroyed. She now feels “naked.” There is also the harsh reality of survival laid bare in these words. Hunger is prevalent. People sit on the ground and moan, fainting from lack of strength. As I envision this scene, my mind goes to places like Gaza and the Ukraine.

Running throughout chapters 1 and 2 is an acknowledgement. Israel and Judah have brought this upon themselves. Their sin, their disobedience, the false prophets – all led to this outcome. The nation who touted God’s presence, power, and might has been laid low by God’s almighty hand. Israel’s enemies rejoice. But even though God “ripped down, showing no compassion” and even though “the comforter who might encourage me is nowhere near,” there remains a faith and a hope in God. The writer encourages Israel and us to, “Pour out your heart before my Lord like water. Lift your hands up to him for the life of your children.” May this be our prayer when we find ourselves in times of suffering and hardship.

Prayer: Lord God, the reality of pain and suffering is right there. The cost of turning from you and walking in the ways of the world is laid bare today. May we read and feel these words, O Lord, as both warning and promise, as both reality and hope. May they work in us to yield faith and obedience to your will and way. Amen.


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A Fire in the Heart

Reading: Jeremiah 17-20

Jeremiah 17:10 – “I, the LORD, probe the heart and discern hidden motives, to give everyone what they deserve, the consequences of their deeds.”

Chapter 17 begins with a condemnation of the sinful. Judah’s sin is “engraved” on their hearts. God will give their land, wealth, and “all that you treasure” to their enemies. They are cursed because they have trusted in human strength. Contrasted to these are the people who trust in and rely on God. They will be like trees planted by the water – ever fruitful. Verse 10 cuts to the heart of the outcome of Judah’s and our choices: “I, the LORD, probe the heart and discern hidden motives, to give everyone what they deserve, the consequences of their deeds.”

In today’s readings we find a few laments from Jeremiah. Often he expresses trust in God and asks for his tormentors to be punished. In chapter 20 his despair is deeper. He regrets being called by God. He ponders quitting. Yet there is “an intense fire in my heart, trapped in my bones.” He knows well his love of God. Yet he is also weary of the abuse, ridicule… He closes this lament cursing the day he was born. It has led to much “suffering and misery.”

We also have two great visuals in today’s readings: the potter and the clay and the clay jar. At the potter’s house, Jeremiah watches the piece become flawed. The potter smashed it down and starts over. God proclaims the power to “dig up, pull down, and destroy”sinful nations. God also claims the power to “build and plant” new nations. It is the people’s choice which they will be. God responds for them rhetorically, saying, “What’s the use?” They have hardened, willful, evil hearts.

God then uses the clay jar as reinforcement. Jeremiah again speaks of their sins and the coming disaster. The siege will be horrific. In desperation they will eat one another’s flesh. He smashes the jar, saying this is what God will do to Judah. He then repeats these words in the temple. The high priest beats and then imprisons Jeremiah. The life of a prophet is not easy.

Prayer: Lord God, we too are called to speak your word and to offer hard truths at times. It is not easy. We can expect to face trials as Jeremiah did. May you become a fire in our hearts, a passion trapped in our bones. Lead us to stand for you and to be a part of your building the kingdom here on earth. Amen.


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On That Day…

Reading: Isaiah 8-11

‭Isaiah 11:10 – “On that day, the root of Jesse will stand as a signal to the peoples. The nations will seek him out, and his dwelling will be glorious.”

Photo credit: Nathan Dumlao

Chapter 8 begins with a prophecy about the downfall of Aram and Israel. It will come before Isaiah’s newborn son can speak. Assyria is on the rise. They will destroy Aram and Israel. They will sweep into Judah, getting all the way to Jerusalem. But they won’t conquer it. God tells Isaiah not to fear. Wait on the Lord. Yes, distress will come, but God is with us. The people will rejoice as God shatters the yoke, lifting their burden. And one day a great light will come. A child will be born. He will establish justice and righteousness forever. One day…

The Assyrians fall mightily upon Israel. This is meant to be a word of warning to Judah. To those who have deprived the needy of their rights and who have robbed the poor, God asks, “Where will you stash your wealth?” One day they too will become prisoners. But at present, it is Assyria who went too far. Because of the king’s pride and arrogance the word of warning became an assault on Judah. The Assyrians swept in, right up to Jerusalem, “the neck.” God will punish the Assyrians. God asks, “Will the ax glorify itself over the one who chops with it?” The hand guiding Assyria’s success will turn on it. The Assyrians army is destroyed with “terrible power.” They limp home, thoroughly defeated.

Chapter 11 brings more words of hope. It is similar to 9:2-7. While Isaiah and later readers hoped for a David-like king in their time, for centuries Christians have read these words as words that foretold Jesus. A shoot, a king, will come from Jesse’s line. The Spirit of God will be upon him. The Spirit will give him wisdom, strength, knowledge, and a fear of the Lord. He will be a champion for the poor and the suffering. What a contrast to the leaders described at the start of chapter 10! Peace and harmony will abound. The nations and the survivors will stream to this king on the holy mountain. “On that day, the root of Jesse will stand as a signal to the peoples. The nations will seek him out, and his dwelling will be glorious.” Thanks be to God.

Prayer: Lord God, thank you for continuing to shape and form us to be your people, to make us into who you created us to be. As you choose to use the powers and things of this world to refine and remake us, help us to see your hand of love guiding it all. Lead us to trust in your ways. Help us to faithfully walk the path illuminated by the light shining in the darkness. Amen.


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The Initial Journey

Reading: Psalm 119:1-88

‭Psalm 119:32 – “I run the same path as your commandments because you give my heart insight.”

Today and tomorrow we delve into Psalm 119. It is the longest chapter in the Bible, with 176 verses and just over 2,400 words. Although lost in translation, the Psalm’s original structure was amazing. It is an acrostic poem. Each stanza begins with one of the 22 letters in the Hebrew alphabet. What’s amazing is that they go in order. What’s really amazing is that in its original form, all eight lines in each stanza all started with that same letter. One last nerdy note: the psalmist used eight different words for the “Law.” This is the focus of Psalm 119.

Alef and Bet begin the Psalm. Their common theme is faith in youth. There is a longing to know God’s ways better. This only comes with time and experience. Gimel and Dalet introduce some lament or suffering. The psalmist’s young faith is “worn out” by studying the Law. Perhaps this feeling arises because challenges have arisen to test their faith. Some are within and some are without. We too experience these situations as we seek to grow in our faith, trust, assurance…

In He and Waw it feels like the psalmist has turned the corner, has gotten through the initial season of testing. The response comes in pleas to help them keep the Law. There is a knowledge that testing will come. Zayin and Khet return to suffering and trial. The psalmist recognizes God’s comfort and mercy. In Tet and Yod the words turn personal. Their maturing faith acknowledges that the suffering was just and that it led them to repentance. The lessons were good for their faith growth. We too learn much in the valleys.

Today’s portion of Psalm 119 closes with Kaf, the 11th letter. The psalmist’s life has returned to a time of testing. They now yearn for God’s help. They ask “How long?” Growth has occurred, though. Instead of the defeated attitude of a young faith, like we see in Gimel and Dalet, there is now a confidence that God will come through again. The psalmist is resolute about walking in faith. May it be so for us as well.

Prayer: Lord God, thank you for the encouragement and for the reminder that faith is a journey. We do not begin and find ourselves at perfection. Faith is a long and slow and steady walk into a deeper and deeper relationship with you. Give us strength for the journey. Bless us with grace when we stray. Grant us perseverance. Walk with us. Amen.


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The First Steps

Readings: Psalms 25-28

‭Psalm 25:10 – “All the LORD’s paths are loving and faithful for those who keep his covenant and laws.”

Photo credit: David Brook Martin

Psalm 25 is a prayer for forgiveness and protection. The psalmist’s declaration of trust is followed by a request to prevent any shame from coming their way. The psalmist edges up to asking God for forgiveness – don’t remember my sins. Verse 10 sums up the psalmist’s belief and what they hold to be true: “All the LORD’s paths are loving and faithful for those who keep his covenant and laws.” If one is faithful, one experiences God’s love. That is the hope. Closing the Psalm, because he or she looks to the Lord, well then, God should forgive their sin and end their suffering. Save me God – because I seek you.

The next Psalm declares the author’s innocence. There are echoes of the book of Job in Psalm 26. Give me justice, God, because I have integrity. Examine me, God, because I’m innocent. I don’t spend time with the wicked. No, I love being in your presence, God. So save me! As was the case with Job, we too feel injustice when good people suffer – especially when it is us.

Psalm 27 is a song of hope during suffering. There is a trust in God’s light and salvation. It is a trust that counters fear. Again the psalmist seeks to be in God’s presence. There God will shelter us, will hide us, and will set our feet high upon a solid rock, above the storms of life. The Psalm closes with a “sure faith” that he or she will experience God’s goodness. In our storms, may this be our hope and our trust.

We close today’s readings with a petition that God would hear and respond. Psalm 28 begins by saying “don’t refuse to hear me” because “you are my rock.” Today I read this and other parts of these Psalms as transactional. I too can treat God that way at times. Returning to the text, a request is made to give the wicked what they deserve. This too would bring relief to the psalmist. The Psalm closes with a declaration of hope, trust, and rejoicing.

Throughout these four Psalms there is a common theme. We must be faithful to and connected to God if we desire for God to hear and respond to our prayers. While this is true, it pre-supposes a relationship as the first step. I am also struck today by the lack of introspection, confession, and repentance. These are essential elements – steps – for a healthy relationship with God. May we take these first steps today. It is where our relationship with God begins anew each day. May it be so.

Prayer: Lord God, you’ve created us in your image, designed us to live in a relationship with you. We can sense this connection, this call. But we are not always faithful. We stray and we fall short. Have patience. Build our trust and faith. Guide our steps. Order them according to your heart. Bless us as we seek to walk daily with you. Amen.